The teacher once asked the class to make a sentence with the phrase pistol too.

Timmy raised his hand, and after being recognized said, “The lone Ranger tamed the wild west with his faithful Indian companion and his pistol too.”

Very good says the teacher.

Little Johnny raised his hand, and after being called on said, “Down at our house we make home-brew, drink till twelve, and piss till two.”

A teacher asked her students to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
Martha said, “My family went to the Louisville Zoo, and it was fascinating to see all the animals.”

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate.’”

Sarita raised her hand. She said, “My family went to the Cincinnati Zoo and I was fascinated by the animals.”

“That’s good, too,” said the teacher, “but I really wanted you to use the word fascinate.”

Little Billy raised his hand.

The teacher hesitated because Billy was noted for his bad language, but surely he couldn’t damage a world like “fascinate,” so she called on him.

Billy said proudly, “My aunt has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her b**bs are so big she can only fasten eight.”

Seven rabbits
Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Paddy: Seven.

Teacher: No, listen carefully again! If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Paddy: Seven.

Teacher: Let’s try this another way! If I give you two apples and two apples and another two apples, how many apples have you got?

Paddy: Six.

Teacher: Good. Now if I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Paddy: Seven.

Teacher: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits is seven?

Paddy: I’ve already got one rabbit at home.