Two friends who grew old together made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other how life after death was.

Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all. After a long life, Dan was the first to die. Benny mourned him, and waited for him to come and visit.

True to his word, two months later, as Benny was sleeping, the voice of Dan appeared in his head. “Benny…Benny…”

“My gosh… Is that you, Dan?”

“Yes, I’ve come back like we agreed.”

“That’s wonderful! What’s it like?”

“Well, I get up in the morning, I have intercourse. I have breakfast and then it’s off to the golf course. I have intercourse again, bathe in the warm sun and then have intercourse a couple more times… then I have lunch (keeping healthy, lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have intercourse the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it’s back to the golf course again. Then it’s more intercourse until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again”.

“Wow, Dan! Heaven sounds amazing!”

“What heaven? I’m a rabbit somewhere in Arizona.”

A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up.
As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life.

“Wow, this is great!” he thought. It wasn’t long before he came to a hedge and after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight – lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass.

“Hey!” he called. “I’m a rabbit from the laboratory and I’ve just escaped. Are you wild rabbits?”

“Yes, come and join us!” they cried.

“What else do you wild rabbits do?” the lab rabbit asked.

“Well,” one of them said, “you see that field there? It’s got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them.”

This, he couldn’t resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful. Later, he asked them again, “What else do you do?”

“You see that field there? It’s got lettuce growing in it. We eat that as well.”

The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while later completely full.

“It’s fantastic out here in the world,” he told them.

“So are you going to live with us then?” one of them asked.

“I’m sorry, I had a great time but I can’t.”

The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit surprised. “Why? We thought you liked it here.”

“I do,” the rabbit replied. “But I must get back to the lab. I’m dying for a cig * rette.”