I’m Child-Free, and I Refuse to Keep Sending Money for My Brother’s Kids—It’s Not My Responsibility

My name is Jane, and I’ve always been very clear about my life choices — I’m child-free by choice and focused on building my career. I’ve worked hard to get where I am, and I’ve managed my finances carefully.

My brother, on the other hand, has three kids and constantly struggles to make ends meet. Over the years, I’ve helped him more times than I can count — covering rent once, sending money for school supplies, even paying a few utility bills.

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But recently, he crossed a line. He asked me to start sending him monthly payments “for the kids.” It wasn’t a loan or an emergency — he literally wanted me to act like a second parent financially. When I refused, he blew up, saying I was selfish and “didn’t understand what family means.”

A few days later, his son — my nephew — called me crying, saying, “Mom and Dad are arguing again about money.” I was furious and heartbroken. I would never want those kids dragged into adult issues, especially over something like this.

When my brother called again asking for help with diapers and groceries, I told him calmly that it’s not my job to fund his household. He chose to have children — I didn’t. I love my nieces and nephews, but I’m not their provider.

For illustrative purposes only

He insists I’m being “cold” because I don’t have kids and can’t understand the pressure. Maybe that’s true — maybe I don’t. But I do understand boundaries, and I know that guilt shouldn’t be a financial tool.

I help when I want to, not when I’m manipulated to. I’m tired of being treated like a walking ATM just because I’m the “successful” sibling. Am I really wrong for saying no this time?

Source: brightside.me

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